Whine about Whining

I can handle teething, gas, cold and flu, but separation anxiety drives me nuts.

Cutie Pie is going through another stage. He must be touching Mommy, or Da Da, but preferably Mommy, at all times. This means I can't go anywhere or do anything in the house if he is awake. Want to clean up Cutie Pie's highchair after breakfast? Cutie Pie clings to my leg and whines until I pick him up. Cutie Pie actually prefers to help do dishes instead of playing with his toys. I've got to remember to tell Cutie Pie this interesting fact in say, ten years.

I've gotten very good at multitasking with Cutie Pie balanced on my hip. My only problem is when Cutie Pie decides he wants to touch a dirty pan in the sink or a boiling pot of water on the stove and he unexpectedly throws all his body weight to the side. So far I've been very lucky to catch him.

Cutie Pie used to like to practice walking and play with his toys. Now he just wants to be held most of the time. He also prefers to be walked around the house or danced with, thank you very much.

The most difficult aspect of Cutie Pie's fear is that he cries every time he realizes that I am not with him. This means that his naps do not last long and nights last forever. As long as I'm holding him, he sleeps. But when I put him down, he screams the second he wakes up. Poor Cutie Pie gets lonely sleeping in his crib. Never fear, Mommy is here!

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The Party is Over

"Ehh!" Cutie Pie rubs his eyes.

"Just try to keep him up another hour."

"Ehh! Ehh!" More eye rubbing.

Cutie Pie is giving us all the classic signs that he is exhausted. If we ignore him, he is sure to let us know his displeasure. He obviously needs to go to bed. The only problem is that this scene played out at a wedding, shortly after dinner was served. I never got to dance with my husband. I didn't even get to see the cake. My night was over. The boss said so.

Da Da and I had to leave our friends and family. While they celebrated, we slowly trudged back to our room with Cutie Pie. When people tell you having a baby is like being grounded 24/7, they aren't kidding.

Cutie Pie was asleep within minutes. The only high point of the evening was when Cutie Pie's Uncle took pity on us and delivered a slice of wedding cake.

I felt incredible guilt for leaving early with little Cutie Pie. I am one of those people who always stays to the end of the reception, sending off my loved ones in a shower of birdseed or rose petals or bubbles or whatever. I didn't want to be perceived as rude for leaving so early but I didn't want anyone to get upset with me for ruining the reception with my screaming baby. Cutie Pie didn't care if Mommy felt guilty, he was sleepy and making sure he got to bed was all that mattered. Being a responsible parent is no fun.

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Nine Months!?

Cutie Pie reached another milestone yesterday. He is nine months old. I don't know how it is possible to love him any more than I did on the day he was born but I do.

Da Da and I are reminded all the time just how lucky we are to have such an easy baby. I like to hold my Cutie Pie and think about how "easy" he is at one in the morning when I am sitting in the rocking chair, pretending to be patient and trying not to fall asleep.

Happy 9 months Cutie Pie!

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Over and Out

It has been a long week. All that coughing and crying has finally worn Cutie Pie out. Last night he hit the wall. He passed out while still eating his dinner. Usually Cutie Pie is a huge fan of dinner. You can see him reaching for the food on his tray but he just couldn't stay awake long enough to eat it.

This cold has officially ended. Hooray for me! I finally got some sleep, too!

I've got to celebrate while I can. I know those two top teeth are just around the corner.

Sleep Wars II: Mommy Strikes Back

Cutie Pie usually wakes up happy. He lays in his bed cooing and playing with his feet until I come in and get him up. The morning after the Ferber experiment was horrible. He woke up screaming. He was agitated all morning. My Mommy guilt was unbearable. He seemed to be angry with me for letting him cry. The book promised that my child would "be happy to see [me] the next morning." The book was wrong.

I am always worried about doing things right for Cutie Pie. I use my baby books like assembly instructions. OK, if I just do this and then that, everything will turn out perfectly. But now I'm starting to question their authority. Just who is this Ferber guy and why does he hate babies so much?

Cutie Pie was back to his old self by yesterday afternoon. I put him to bed using the same old routine I always use. Only last night, Cutie Pie was sleepy. The dogs didn't bark. Everything went smoothly and Cutie Pie slept over 12 hours straight. I actually got to take a shower AND brush my teeth in the morning!

Take that, Ferber!

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Sleep Wars

A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away, there lived a perfect baby who slept through the night, only waking for legitimate reasons and he easily fell back asleep when his mother put him into his bed. Cutie Pie has never met this baby.

For the past few nights, Cutie Pie has been running the show. He hasn't been sleeping well because he's been getting over a cold. Each time he coughs he wakes himself up. Then he's miserable because he wants to be asleep but he's wide awake.

I realized tonight that Cutie Pie's cold is gone but he's still crying each time he wakes up. I also noticed that I am running into his room just like I said I never would do. I heard a wail or shriek and it was like I'm off to the races. I would arrive at his crib side panting. Cutie Pie would just smile. Sometimes he'd even laugh. This is how I knew that if I ever wanted to sleep again, it was time to do something about it.

My favorite baby-bible, "Baby 411" says that six month old babies often develop bad sleep habits and it's time for me to teach my Cutie Pie how to fall asleep properly. I read the chapter on Ferberizing Cutie Pie and the next time Cutie Pie woke up I tried it out.

It was horrible. It was torture. Cutie Pie screamed and wailed. He cried big crocodile tears. I cried too. The first five minutes seemed like five years. I kept reading the line in the book that says "Yes, the first night will be ugly." Yeah, no kidding. But I held strong because I felt like this was the right thing to do.

The phone rang and someone (you know who you are) told me he sounded like he was sick. Thanks for being supportive. Now my Mom-anxiety was running on overdrive. What if he is sick and I just don't know it? He wasn't. What if letting him cry will emotionally scar him for life? I'm pretty sure that won't happen in one night. What if Ferberizing means teaching Cutie Pie to just give up on his goals and I'm sending him down a path of failure? That one was a stretch.

As you can tell, I gave up. I picked up my baby boy. I cuddled and kissed him and he laughed and laughed. Boy is he good. Then we started our bedtime routine over. We rocked, read and nursed until he fell asleep. I laid him down in his crib and tip toed out of the room. I felt like a failure because I caved. But at least he was asleep.

Not two minutes later, the dog barked. I wanted to scream but Cutie Pie did it for me. Here we go again. I would try the technique again. I understood that it would be harder this time because I had already given in but I was prepared. Or so I thought. I don't know how many cycles of the technique I waited because it all seems like an emotional blur. But I caved again and failure never felt so good.

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Butterfly Effect

There's a reason they say "Let sleeping babes lie." Everyone knows that it is bad luck to wake a baby. When I picked Cutie Pie up from school today, he was passed out cold in his bed. I told his Teacher I had a dreadful feeling about waking him and boy was I right. He has not slept at all since.

He woke up immediately when I picked him up. By the time we got to the car, his eyes were wide open and he was ready to party. He could not be convinced to play by himself when he got home so I got to practice the art of multitasking by holding him with one hand while cooking, doing dishes and eating my own dinner. Although inconvenient, it's a great workout. My arms have never looked so nice.

Then as if to make matters worse, I interrupted Cutie Pie's evening routine so he could spend a little time with his Dad before he went to bed. Each night Cutie Pie gets his dinner of some pureed vegetable that he will probably never eat again once he is done with baby food. Then he takes his bath. Tonight he learned to splash the water and I never thought I would get him out of that bathtub. He had a blast! He didn't even care when he would splash the water so hard it would get in his eyes. After his bath, Cutie Pie gets dressed for bed. Then he usually says good night to Daddy and the doggies then nurses to sleep while Mommy reads him a story and says prayers. But tonight Daddy was running late so I let Cutie Pie play in his pajamas until he got home. Sounds like no big deal right?

It's like the butterfly effect. Who knew that two small interruptions in his day, could cause so much chaos for Cutie Pie? He has woken up every twenty minutes since I put him down. I think he's dreaming about splashing in the bath because he seems to be trying to splash his sheets. I wonder if they make water beds for babies? I have absolutely no chance of getting any sleep tonight so I might as well surrender now.

Schedule and routine has always been important to my Cutie Pie. Right from the beginning, I noticed that he became agitated when we kept him out late. Those darn baby books I'm always talking about say it's OK to deviate from the schedule every now and then but make sure you follow it most of the time. The baby will be happier following the schedule. It's important that the child know what to expect.

What lesson has Cutie Pie taught me from this experience? Make sure I always bring home a few files from work so I have something to do if I have to stay up all night.

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